I will die if light touches me.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
