alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Randomize
