I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
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