Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
