Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
