thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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