break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
