Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize