Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize