Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Randomize
