You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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