Barsexuality is the new black.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
