I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
