we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
