were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
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