I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
