Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Randomize
