Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
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