I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
