we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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