We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize