People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize