My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize