Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
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