dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Randomize
