My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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