and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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