Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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