I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Randomize
