He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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