508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
