I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
