Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
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