Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
