i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Randomize
