he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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