Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
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