is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Randomize
