what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
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