So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
