I'm eating all of the evidence.
babies were throwing up all over the place
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
