can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Randomize
