that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Randomize
