im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Found the puke drawer
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
