i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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