ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
