I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
