if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
