I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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