there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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