haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
He did a backflip because drugs
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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